As the television’s revenue model has been under siege from all sides, the pharmaceutical industry’s multi-billion tactic of bypassing doctors and going right to consumers with their advertising has paid off richly. And not just in money, but also in hysterically shocking FDA-required disclosure statements. How much fun have the stand up comedians had with the “four hour erection”?
Which brings us to Flowmax. Buried in their side effects disclosure on their latest spot was this statement, “…may cause runny nose and reduced semen.”
The more you think about that the more unsettling it is. (And in case you don’t believe me, here’s a snippet from the multi-page PDF on the side effects:)
Pharmas are pretty much the last ones still buying 60 second TV spots. They spend 30 seconds telling you why you should take the drug and then 30 seconds telling you why you shouldn’t. It’s bizarre and often comical, but I assume it’s working because media spending is up to over $5 billion a year.
Huh… Decreased semen, a runny nose and a floppy iris. Kinda goes to show you that no matter how horrible an ad is, awareness always makes money.
“Four hour erection” always cracked me up. I picture all these pharma execs thinking that they snuck a huge benefit into a supposed averse side effect. Too funny!
My favorite is the asthma medicine that may cause “asthma-related death,” and warns that you should notify your doctor if you have involuntary leg movements as these may become permanent. Permanent!
And then, after the death and permanent spasm syndrome, and decreased semen, they all (ALL) list “dry mouth.”
As if my spasming corpse wasn’t bad enough, I’m experiencing a lack of moisture here in my mouth.